First Snowfall

Siya, “Winter has come Anay and look I’m here.”

Siya and Anay were one of a kind. They had this silly ritual that no matter where they were they would meet in their home town whenever the first snow would fall.

They were born in the beautiful town of Manali and had known each other from the time since they were little kids. They went to school together, studied in the same class, shared the same desk but more than anything they had shared their entire lives with each other. There wasn’t anything that they both didn’t know about each other. They would share every tiny to every huge thing with each other. The universe had already given them that one thing that most can’t find even in a lifetime. Everyone including their parents were aware about the bond that existing between the two and everyone pictured them together, always.

Life moved on and the days passed by soon, little Siya and Anay had now grown up and so had their bond. But unfortunately, time had come when both had to part ways and go ahead in the world to build their own paths and their own careers. Siya moved to Bangalore for a job in a finance firm and Anay moved to Mumbai to be a software engineer. Initial few months were very difficult for both because this was the first time that they had stayed apart for so long. But as days passed they got busier in their lives and started getting used to their new way of life.

It was 20^th August, Siya’s birthday. First birthday away from her soulmate, her friend, Anay. The clock had already hit 12:00 AM but she didn’t get a call from Anay, not even a message. She became sad but kept on waiting until she dozed off. She woke up next day and to her wonders, Anay was sitting there in her living room with a bouquet full of Siya’s favorite orchids. Siya was baffled! She ran and hugged him.

She asked him,” What are you doing here so far from Mumbai?”

Anay very sweetly replied, “How could I miss your birthday.”

They had a lot of fun that day. They went out for shopping, watched a movie together and caught up on each other’s lives. Finally, it was the time for Anay to leave.

Before leaving Anay said to Siya,” Do you remember how much we both loved the first snowfall of Manali.”

To which Siya excitedly replied,” Yes!”

Anay continued, “Let’s make a pact, no matter wherever in the world we both are, we will meet in Manali every year after the first snowfall. No call, no messages and no planning regarding this but we need to be there. We would directly meet in Manali. Every year for the rest of our lives.”

Siya asked interestingly,” But where would we meet?”

Anay thought a little and replied, “Whoever reaches first will have to go to other’s home.”

“You got yourself a deal buddy.” Replied Siya.

Anay left for Mumbai and Siya went back to her apartment. Days went by and it was the month of December, the time for the first snowfall in Manali. Siya had just landed back in Manali and was excited to meet Anay. But Anay was already there waiting for her outside her home with an Orchid bouquet in his hands. Siya rushed towards him and hugged him tightly.

They had lived up to the first year of their deal!

Life moved on, 2 more years passed and Anay and Siya kept on visiting each other regularly and both fulfilled their promise of meeting whenever the first snowfall happened in Manali.

Everything was going great when one-day on their daily catchup calls Siya told Anay, “There is this really cute guy Tarun in my office and I think I like him.”

Anay sounded alarmed and replied, “Forget about him and tell me something else.”

Siya just skipped the topic and they started talking about something else. After a few days Siya noticed that whenever Siya tried to talk about Tarun, Anay would change the topic. This disturbed Siya as she was not able to understand that what was going on with Anay.

Siya decided to visit Anay in Mumbai and confront him. She went to Mumbai and met Anay.

“What is going on Anay” questioned Siya.

“Going on what?” replied Anay.

Siya further questioned, “See whenever I talk about Tarun, you act weird. I just want to know what is wrong.”

Anay replied, “Nothing is wrong just that I don’t like talking about him. And neither do I like you talking to that looser.”

Siya sounded furious, “Why Anay? You are my best friend and we have shared everything from childhood. There is this guy I might end up with and I like him because he is really nice and cute so what is wrong in that? It is fine that you don’t want to talk about him but why are you calling him a looser? I just came over because I thought that you might be disturbed because of something but here you are talking shit about people you don’t even know. What is wrong with you?”

Anay shouted, “I love you! This is what is wrong with me. I can’t stand the thought of you being with someone else, this is what is wrong with me. I have loved you from the very first day that I saw you in kindergarten Siya and having gone away from you has just increased this love, this feeling of being with you a hundred folds. I know you Siya, better than you do. I know that you don’t love me which is the very reason that I didn’t confess my love for you. I wanted to wait. I wanted to wait till the time you would also develop the same feelings for me and then this Tarun comes in from nowhere and wants to take you away from me. How can I be normal about it? How can I let you go? And how can I hear you talking about someone else? You tell me!”

Siya was astounded. A long silence. Siya could hear Anay breathe heavily. And then Siya said, “I love you, I have always loved you but not in the way that you want.” Siya left.

Siya took her flight to Bangalore and didn’t look back after that. She concentrated on her career and stopped talking to Anay. Anay tried reaching out many times to her but she never replied. That year she did not go to catch the first snowfall with Anay and neither did she go the next year. She stopped visiting Manali altogether.  Slowly, she stopped getting any calls and messages from Anay. But she never stopped thinking about him. She had loved him deep down. Maybe she wasn’t ready to accept it in front of Anay when he asked but she also had loved him. But now it was too late, 5 years too late! Too late to go back and ask for the love that she had so ruthlessly rejected. Slowly the thought of meeting Anay kept on growing deep inside that she couldn’t resist it anymore. That year she decided that she would visit Manali when the first snowfall hits Manali. And she did make it. She landed in Manali and went to Anay’s home to see if he had come to keep his promise or not.

And there she is now, sitting in Anay’s home, in his room, in front of his photo, which has a garland on it.

Siya was thinking about all the beautiful and tough times she had seen with Anay when tears rolled out of her eyes. Anay’s mother had told her that Anay had died 3 years back in a car accident, 2 years after they stopped talking.

Anay’s mother held Siya’s hand and said, “You know he really loved you. He never told me but I always knew. You remember your first day together in school? He came back home that day and told me that Mumma, today I saw a fairy in my class, she sits with me on my desk and she is beautiful. And he told me that one day he was going to marry you.”

Tears flooded out of Siya’s eyes while Anay’s mother continued, “He told me that you two had stopped talking. Although he made me promise not to talk to you about it. He really loved you dear. He wanted you to be happy. I wish he was here today to tell you all this but I think that I can ask for one thing from you. Stay happy Siya because this is what Anay ever wanted. Now you have to be happy for my son too.”

Siya left Anay’s home with a deep regret in her heart. She had lost someone she had loved the most. She had lost her soulmate. It made her wonder that how difficult is to get someone whom you truly love and who truly loves you back, but how easy it is to loose them.

So, spend whatever time you have with the one’s you love so that even if someone must go, you have no regrets!

-by Ambuj